Moody

Day 43- Friday
Up early again today! Only had 7 hours sleep (I need 9-10 to be on top form!) and woken by Matt. He is excited as it's his Christmas holiday now!

Need a productive day as know will be useless next week. Wrap presents, write xmas cards, send emails about Dubai race (t-shirt order in to Beating Bowel Cancer) and make my scrap book. My scrap book is really good. I have all the emails, cards and facebook messages people have sent me printed and cut out in it. As well as being a memory book I am going to read it when I feel down. My scrap book song is……….. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8smO4VS9134

Last night was really good. The birthday boy was drunk within the first hour as he is so rubbish at drinking games! Mr Tetley kept us entertained with stories all night! Unfortunately 'cancer' put a slight dampener on the evening as once I had eaten the steak I started getting pains around my right side again. So annoying that I couldn’t enjoy one night out being normal.

As the afternoon goes on I feel myself getting more and more in a bad mood. Think it is just knowing that next week I will feel bad and not want or be able to do much or leave the house. Don't feel sad, just down and moody. Hopefully the comedy club tonight will get me out of it.

Repaint my nails clear with gold glitter- sounds awful and very 80s but looks good. Well at least I like it! Wearing black skinny jeans and my sheer shirt that is meant to be one of my Christmas presents! Haven’t worn skinny jeans out in the evening for about 5 years- the last time my bum and thighs weren't huge! Wearing the new gold shoes again- cost so much have to get my moneys worth!

Forgot to mention last night that I dried and straightened by own hair. Same again tonight. So yesterday was the first official day in 40+ days that I have been completely independent. Depressing that probably come Tuesday mum will be washing and drying my hair again as I won't have the energy. Dr 'K' warned me that people normally hit a brick wall emotionally around the 4th round of treatment and so easy to see why. I have got to use Christmas day as my focus and aim.

Anyway, off now to cheer myself up!