Anxiety arrives

Day 67 – Monday
Had a bit of a bad evening, got extremely weak after dinner and had to just go and lie on the bed. Then I started to feel anxious and almost a bit like I was going to have a panic attack. I am normally a reasonable person who can rationalize mind over matter situations (apart from my irrational fear of flying which I have no control over!) but I can feel myself losing control and I feel like it's getting difficult to breathe. I try to talk myself out of it, there is nothing to worry about, my symptoms must just be due to my low red blood cell count. Sensible thinking does not seem to be working so I look up acupressure points to help anxiety. This is a good site I use when looking up acupuncture points for patients.
http://www.yinyanghouse.com/basics/arm_hand_acupressure_points
I try stimulating PC3 and HT7 for a couple of minutes and this seems to calm me. I need to get a grip as I don’t want to be taking an anti-anxiety medicine as well as all my anti-nausea meds.

Manage to relax enough to go to sleep and then at 3.30 I'm wide awake again. Try to lie still so I don’t disturb Matt but my mind is racing. Fall back to sleep after an hour or so. Unfortunately I wake this morning not feeling any better. Still really weak as though I don't have an ounce of energy. Getting really frustrated now. Haven’t left the estate for days.

Looking forward to Jamie Oliver's chicken pie tonight. Haven’t fancied much the last few days but this pie is good. Half way through cooking it the gas runs out. And the gas man can't deliver a new bottle until tomorrow- great. The pie has to go on hold and now we are left with nothing but soup for dinner. Decide what I really want is a milkshake and some form of Galaxy chocolate. So in a mad dash, as he is going to football training, Matt drops us off to pick up the goods! The real world is still happening I am pleased to note on the short journey. A Haagen Dazs vanilla and cookies and cream milkshake- perfect! And a selection of Galaxy chocolate- the large bars! Home to watch the new series of 'One born every minute', my favourite programme.

Shame I don't seem to be improving. Everything crossed for tomorrow.